Do you still visit his grave?

Me: How does your current husband feel when you bring up your deceased husband?

Yan: He gets bothered because that was my past life and we’re doing new things and making new memories. Thankfully he understands that I may miss him and I may think of him often. I guess he’s not entirely bothered.

Me: Yeah, it’s not like you guys divorced. You loved him fully and then he was gone. The love just doesn’t disappear right? Do you visit his grave?

Yan: No. When I used to visit the grave, I felt worse. I couldn’t find peace to move on. He was gone and I had to continue life all by myself. My kids still needed mommy, bills didn’t stop coming, I just had to somehow find peace and that meant I had to stop visiting his grave.

Me: How did your family feel when you started dating again?

Yan: They didn’t like him because he didn’t have money. He wasn’t taking us from a pit and placing me and my children in a palace. He asked me “Do you want to struggle together” and I said yes. In this life we’re always going to struggle so why not struggle in agreement together? My family didn’t like the fact that I was actually dating again after my first husband passed. Therefore, I moved to another state. Away from my family who kept judging me on top of the pain I was already going through and away from all the people who knew my deceased husband and would look at me with pity every time they saw me. I hated that.

Me: The passing of your husband must have changed your outlook in life. I mean, I could tell because you’re so level headed.

Yan: I don’t pay attention to the new trends, clothing, looks, money, and things. I treat people the way I want to be treated. I take pleasure in the small things.

Life is so much more than what people make it.

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I Didn’t Know Where To Look

Story submitted by Joselyn W.

Four years ago I was going through a really hard time in my life. I made a decision without thinking it through but thought it was for the best.

That decision landed me behind bars for almost a year.

I was lost, confused and just didn’t know where to look. I was not going to church like I used to and I felt like God just gave up on me. The day of my sentencing I was able to go home and I had 3 months to surrender. I remember getting in my car and just yelling, crying wondering why! I knew that I did this to myself and didn’t think about anybody. I didn’t want to live anymore. I wanted to just go to a bridge and just jump. Nobody knew or understood the demon that I was fighting within.

One night I started to drive with no destination in mind and the devil was really attacking my spirit. I started to drive to the nearest bridge, thinking it would be the best thing to do. As I get closer to the bridge my phone rings it was my best friend. She just wanted to talk and I held every tear that I needed to so I wouldn’t give it away. She knew that I was going thru an emotional rollercoaster but she never knew how bad the thoughts that were going thru my mind were. As she was talking to me she started to tell me that everybody makes mistakes and we all learn from them. She said more words but she never knew or understood how she saved my life that day. It was God!

As my sentencing got closer, I remember hugging my son and just crying letting him know that mommy will be gone for a little while but that I will be back and he will be able to see me soon. We cried, hugged and said our I love you!

The day that I surrendered, I remember asking God to protect me. As I walked in and sat down I was surrounded by 4 walls. As I did my time God spoke to my heart and all I felt was peace. He let me see that some decisions in my life were not perfect but he was going to help me get thru them. He allowed me to see that the relationship that I was in at the time was not for me, and I let it go once I got home.

We all make mistakes. Some may be larger than others, but no matter what God will always be by our side. There are times when we feel like He stopped listening to us or that He doesn’t care, but He does. He will never leave our side no matter the disappointments that we provide to Him, He will always be there. He may allow us to fall at times but He will be by our side to pick us up. Lord knows that without the strength that He provided to me I may not be here today. He allows you to see the toxic people in your life and is up to you to let them go and learn from them!

 

Contact us if you want to submit your story.

3 Times the Devil Tried to Destroy Me and 3 Times He Failed.

Story submitted by Gabby V.

“The first time was when I was in my mother’s womb. She had a very bad pregnancy. The doctors said that when I come out, I was going to die instantly. One day, my mother went to church and my cousin wanted to go up for prayer. She asked my mother to go up with her so my mom went.

Instead of the preacher praying for my cousin, he prayed for my mother and my mother felt the presence of God healing me. While that was happening, no one could touch my mother until God was finished with her. I was born on February 19,1997 as the healthiest premature baby born 2 months early.

The second time, I GOT MY LICENSE! I was a 17-year-old teen with her license and a car! My sister was sitting in the passanger seat with me and my friend was sitting in the back. We wanted pizza! If you’re from Elizabeth, New Jersey you would know that route 1&9 is always packed. As a new driver, I didn’t want to wait in traffic so  I made a turn into a one-way street. When I realized where I was going, I hit a pole because there was a car heading my direction. It was because of God that I could get out of the wreck without a scratch, without hurting my sister or my friend and, without completely wrecking the car! God is good!

The third time, I ate spoiled chicken. Yes! I know, chicken! How? That’s my question EXACTLY! No one knew what I had at the time. I was lying in bed for 3 months vomiting and with diarrhea every single day. I was ordered to take some pills. I lost about 30 pounds because of this. I didn’t know what a good sleep was for 3 months because I had the chills in the middle of night… Every night. Doctors kept telling me I had the flu and that I had the stomach virus but no one could figure exactly what virus or infection I had. Salmonella is some very very very very bad bacteria. You could die from salmonella poisoning if you have for too long. I had the bacteria in my system for 3+ months. My aunt, my church, my parents and, my family all gathered around me and prayed. God healed me instantly! I received antibiotic shots and I was done. I never experienced something like that ever again.

God has a plan for each one of you that is reading this right now. Trust me, you would not be here if he didn’t have a plan. So, trust in Him.

The devil tried to destroy me and failed! He knows that God has me under His wing and nothing will happen unless God says otherwise!”