She believed she could so she did 

Leaps of faith are underrated. We need to make a bigger hype about them because those are the game changers. 
It all started in 2011, a man ministered to me and told me that my career was coming close. It meant a lot to me at that time because I pondered about it over and over in my head. I had already enlisted into the Army, preparing for boot camp and anticipating spending 52 weeks training for my MOS (35W) – Electronic Warfare Signal Intelligence. Might I add: I was super excited to get my butt out there but… I wasn’t going. 

Did I consult the Lord? No. If I had done so, I would not have wasted my time. God stopped me in my tracks. 

How?! 

After being sworn in, standing before the American flag giving my soul to the military, the Lord miraculously ended what I thought was going to be my future. 

I got pregnant.

 
So there I was. In church. Career-less with a small child. I couldn’t go to school and I was in and out of minimum wage jobs. I felt useless. But the Lord told me through a minister that he had prepared for me a career. I wasn’t anticipating it because I didn’t believe it.  
10/2011 I almost didn’t go to the interview. The job offer seemed sketchy. I was 3 minutes late for the interview and I wore a sweater dress. For some odd reason, I got the job. It was an entry level position at a medical billing company helping out with accounting. Within months I was promoted to a claims specialist. 
It was 06/2015, almost 4 years passed and I was ready for change. I wanted to expand my knowledge in the billing field so I took that leap of faith and accepted a job as a billing manager at a Chiropractic office. I learned the revenue cycle first hand which was great but
I hated it. 

Months passed and I found a job at Hoboken, NJ at another billing office. I learned a bit more about commercial insurance but,
I hated it. 

Then came my dream job. I was hired at an actual hospital working as a medical biller. It was tough but I LOVED IT. Unfortunately, it was only temporary. 

My last stop was at a billing office literally pushing paper. I finished my duties and resigned. 
2016 has been a serious rollercoaster as far as my career was concerned. I learned soooo much but I had to go through soooo much to get where I am now. 

Where am I? 

Back at my 2011 job. 
People kept questioning why my job status was always unstable. Listen, if you’re trying to get somewhere in life, you have to do some scary, ground shaking things. I took risks and I came out a pro. I’m at a point that I could run a billing business on my own. (Everything in its time). 

The Lord gave a command and the command came through for me. I am a gosh darn flipping awesome medical biller. I get doctors paid like that 👏🏽. I love what I do. 

Lord, thank you for the lessons. For giving me strength to endure uncertain times. Thanks for guiding me back to where I’m supposed to be. In Jesus name. AMEN! 

Now, let US make man 

Before my eyes, I didn’t have to look far. I didn’t have to search vigorously, or even willingly. I simply touched the border of Jesus’ garment and it hit me like a ton of bricks. 

“KG, let’s start a daily devotional. Even if you have to start at Genesis. You know you’d find something new.”

I went for it. Genesis 1:1 God created the heavens and the earth…

Wow God, I see what people mean when they say You make something out of nothing. The Earth had no form, darkness everywhere. And You? So sovereign and so in control, spoke light and it became. But here I am stressing about my finances as Christmas approaches  not realizing that with just one word, You can make a miracle. 

That was just the beginning. I continued to read and I bumped into this gem. 

Gen 1:26 Then God said, “Now let’s make humans who will be like us. 

Let’s?! 

Us?!

It’s clear as day! Jesus and the Holy Spirit were present during the creation of the earth. 

Living in a society that tries to offer hope from someone or something other than Jesus brings uncertainty but reading this gives me confidence to stand for what is true. 

Jesus is true. The comfort of the Holy Spirit is tangible and proven. God’s powerful essence, unquestionable. 

To even think that the stars in the sky, the moon, the sun just simply appeared by accident requires more faith than to believe a powerful, almighty being Who created it all. 

Am I that human? Am I like You? Let that be my desire every single day. 

You gotta know

@authkg 

Stephen

Stephen: The first Christian who was martyred in the book of acts.

There were many false accusations that stirred up against him. Instead of defending himself, he preached the gospel and told the Jews that they rejected their savior.

Then, he was stoned to death. 

I always find myself defending my spiritually. Stephen shows me that it isn’t necessary. 

He could have used that moment to claim his innocence. He found something much more important than that. 

So important, it was worth dying for. 

Afraid of what?

So many uncertainties and frequent human inconsistencies leave so much room for fear. Fear that perhaps our comfort gets torn out from under our feet. That in an instant, our lives go from a constant, subtle wave to a thunderous storm tossing us left and right resulting in our destruction. 

Have no fear, The Lord says that He is our stronghold. That throughout the storm, He is the lighthouse in the middle of the ocean that never moves; a strong tower that remains sustained. We run to It and are saved. 

I can’t deny being provoked by the storm to make drastic decisions coming from fear. What I can say is, moving according to fear leads to more uncertainty. 

Let’s put our emotions aside a move towards what scripture directs us to do. God is always right. We, on the other hand, are most likely wrong. 

@Authkg

Grace Wins

I remember like it was yesterday. Walking to the bathroom for the 4th time in one hour, not to use it but to cry. Never in my life have I ever felt so unworthy like I did at that moment. I was aware that I didn’t deserve God’s mercy. The pain was unbearable. So bad that it was difficult to exhale. Now, I understand that the pain was for a purpose. 

The only way to truly understand what Grace meant, I had to know how it felt to be in need of it. I needed God’s love and favor even though I didn’t deserve it. The best part of this was that God gave it to me. It was a gift. Underserved, unearned and with no conditions. God loved me and found favor in me despite my sins. He gave me victories to many battles and kept me from my enemies. He protected me from further shame and returned what the enemy stole from me (with interest). 

The most sorrowful moments of my life was when God was revealing His mysteries to me. These things don’t come on a silver platter, they come with tears of repentance and a humble heart. A soul aware of it’s unworthiness to stand before a Holy God. 

“There’s a war between guilt and grace and their fighting for a sacred space but I’m living proof, GRACE WINS EVERYTIME”. 

And so it did.  

Praise dance to Grace Wins by Matthew West
Grace Wins by Matthew West-Music video

Remembering Past = Faith for the Future

I love to see how far I’ve come in this Christian walk. I enjoy going back to old blogs remembering how I felt when I wrote them, remembering how some blogs were written out of spite or out of anger. I look back and remembered how I felt; as if I knew it all. No way am I going to knock myself down for it. Those feelings were genuine and just because it isn’t relevant now doesn’t mean that it’s not important. 

It’s sad how we sometimes feel the best solution to our mind battles is to pretend the past never existed. We drown in our guilt from past decision or past mistakes instead of embracing them just as Psalms 77:11 says. 

Is it hard to remember how the Lord delivered us from our errors? Is it difficult to review all the times the Lord blessed us despite of our foolishness. Is it hard to be honest with our mistakes and to not…pretend. I have to admit, these things can be difficult for some including myself. It’s hard for me to admit to MYSELF that I carry envy in my heart. An envy that I still ask God why its presence still exists in me. I’m learning today that God uses my struggle to remind me what He took me out of. To remind me that although people can do what I wish I can do or posses what I wish I had doesn’t mean that I am less than (<). It means that I am not meant to be anyone else. That God has blessed me in specific areas according to HIS will. Not mine. 

See, it’s not terrible to admit to your sin. It’s not terrible to hold onto a piece of your past. It isn’t the end of the word if you be just a little transparent. Being honest and looking back to the days of old shouldn’t bring you to a bad place rather, it should bring you to a new place. A place where you begin to see some change in your being. The way you walk, talk and act. 

No I won’t go back and delete previous blogs or delete previous statuses on my Facebook or remove old photos from my IG. I’m happy. If you don’t like me at my state of growing and learning, than you won’t like me now cuz guess what? 

I am still growing and learning. 

Experience: I thought I knew

These past few months have kept my eyebrows in the raised position for many reasons. I wish I could get into detail but unfortunately I have yet to find the words to explain exactly how I’ve been feeling. Lately, I’ve been asking myself the same question. “You think you know huh? You think you know?”
My answer?

“Ha! Not anymore.”

I have been through plenty of…things in this Christian walk to be able to say confidently that I have some meaningful testimonies. I’ve seen God work in my life firsthand and I share my experiences with others hoping they would grasp an idea of how God functions.

How God functions?!

YHVH is NOT a toy that when you flip the “on” switch, He lights up and sings a tune. He’s not a computer that when you press the “backspace” key, you can delete a letter or a sentence. God is not a television that when you click guide, you can view upcoming episodes. Let me try to explain.

I spoke of God as if I spoke of a “thing” that responds based on my action. If I prayed an hour, my sadness would cease. Yes, He has delivered me that same way but I shouldn’t assume that to be the ONLY way.

Once, I had to make some quick decisions and I fasted for a week. God responded by telling me what my next steps should be. I shouldn’t assume that fasting is the ONLY way to find help in regards to my decisions for my future.

If you give generously, God would bless your finances right? How can I tell someone else to do the same if they have nothing to give?  I portrayed God as some kind of genie.  You rub a lamp and He responds by granting 3 wishes. That he is not.

Why do I sound unsettling? I am. When I pressed the “on” button in my life, sometimes God’s volume went up. I would press the guide button and God would go to channel 5. I would lower the volume and God would play a movie.

I have to admit, there were times I did nothing for the Kingdom, and God responded with blessings as if I’ve done tons of Christian things. God, I understand.

You are not a God of MY personal experience. You don’t maneuver in someone else’s life based on how you moved in mine. I shouldn’t guide someone in their struggle based on how I was guided through my own. Everyone is different and everyone absorbs the matters of God in unlike ways. My job isn’t to determine the best solutions to one’s storm. My job is to express God’s goodness in mine. Not based on what I did but based on what HE did.

God’s ways are not ours. The more we think we know, the less we actually know. Therefore, at times, my response will be, “I don’t know.”

And that’s okay

Blocked

I’ve been wasting so much time on brainstorming. Taking notes here, random scraps of paper all over there and various notes in my cellphone all over the place. In the end, did I write about any of those thought-provoking pieces of a good blog? No. sometimes it takes a whole lot of unnecessary time to finally realize that I’m a right now person. When I’m inspired, rather than finding a piece of paper to note my terrific thought for later, I should write it at that moment.

Now that I have finally recognized the cork that is blocking my flow of capabilities, let’s move on.

Once upon a time,

The end.

I guess the matter here wasn’t just recognizing the cork, but removing it.

 

Now, if I were you…

The damage is done and it’s hard to wish greatness in your enemy’s life. Their failure, pleasing.

Who are you kidding? Telling yourself that your thoughts are wrong doesn’t remove its lovely feeling.

You can repent & you can pray and ask God to take it away but we all know the truth.

Their downfall is what you wanted.

Their sorrow is what you scoffed at.

Their desperation, comforting.

You can be honest all you want and say “I don’t want to think that way.”

That doesn’t erase the fact that you thought it in the first place.

Don’t you get it, you’re human.

Understand that it was The Cross that blocks the “comes around” that should result because of that attitude.

If I were you, I’d praise Him.

What’s wrong with being wrong?

We fight tooth and nail to defend ourselves regardless of the lie we’re upholding. 

Drop it now, lies are scolding. 

How far can we take it? So far we would cover it. 

Underneath contorted truths or deep in denial, how much will you fight? 

Until trial?

You’re wrong. It’s okay. Admit it, it alright. 

I’ve been through it, holding on to pride so tight. 

I’m at a point in my life, I just say what it is. 

Faulty on my part, I can’t resist

Tell the truth, don’t hold onto defense so long.

Cuz Seriously, what’s wrong with being wrong?