Secrets

When you lock up all your deepest secrets,

You will never accept love at its deepest.

When they show you love, how could you believe it?

Because if they knew your secret

They really wouldn’t love you or try to heal it.

The shame will surface and you’ll feel it.

So you keep your secrets a secret.

 

Don’t be scared to let it go

It’s your secret but God already knows.

Open up, let your secrets show.

Healing takes over and mercy flows.

Don’t be nervous just let it blow!

Your secrets to many, are like Gold!

And when someone loves, you feel it whole.

The shame is gone and your face glows.

Sin like scarlet, now you’re snow

when you let your secrets go.

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True Convo

My Child! Let’s sit. I missed you so much

I need you to know that you’re loved a bunch.

I know that life has clouded the truth

So let’s start here! tell me, what bothers you?

 

I asked The All Knowing All Powerful and True

Don’t you already know where I’ve been and what I’ve been through?

 

He said of course I do my love, don’t be so confused.

I’d just love to hear from your point of view.

 

I said, I grew up fatherless and the pain stings til this day.

It distorts the truth of who You are, like you’re not here to stay.

He didn’t love me enough to raise me

He didn’t care enough to look for me

He wasn’t there to protect me

He wasn’t there to love me

They say You’re The Father of all who believe

A Father? So that must mean You too will leave.

 

He said, I’m sorry about the gap that put between us.

I want to restore you but you need to trust.

I’m not the son of man that I should lie.

Give me a chance my daughter, don’t pass me by.

 

I yelled, fine I give in! What then do I call you?

God? The Holy one? Master? To me, who are you?

 

He whispered; Call me Daddy to keep you from religious habits.

There is no easy way to do this or grasp it.

We need time, relationship and honesty.

At anytime, just know you can call on me.

In any place in any way, don’t worry my child.

I have all the patience in this world; I can wait a long while.

 

But don’t lose sight of me in the rain.

Then all you will ever see is your pain.

And Sunday school is not in session,

Because this is a flying lesson.

So Hold my hand, we will do this together

I am God. I’ll be with you forever.

A flying lesson? I said swiftly and excited.

That sounds too fun, is it okay to be delighted?

I mean, It seems You’re a bore the way they speak of you.

Don’t you punish and condemn like you’re known to do?

 

Punish and condemn? He questioned and smiled lightly.

Is that all they are saying about me?

Seems like my words are heavily mediated by my people.

You know, you have full access to my steeple?

 

NO! Because you are Holy and too far for me to reach.

Free access to you is not what they teach.

Don’t I have to be right with you to be considered?

Can you just fix me now like a wizard?

Your Holiness seems so cold and sterile.

Obvious to me, my life is in peril

 

He replied to me with so much love and Grace

Your heart I want. Your heart I chase.

Come to me as your are

Your idea of me is so far

I am Love, I am peace, I am your foundation

Believe in me child. I am your salvation.

 

 

Nothing More Than Feelings

We respond so hastily to our feelings. We may even pay more attention to our own feelings than the Written Word of God. There have been plenty of times when I felt God’s love for me was nonexistent, but I learned that those feelings were far from the truth. I listened to those lies over and over until scripture went through one ear and came out the other. Listening to our own feelings produces an invisible barrier around the heart that blocks the truth from entering. Ever felt like the pastor was preaching an encouraging, grace filled sermon that you felt didn’t apply to you? Those are feelings taking over preventing The Truth to come to life.

 
God has taught me through various trials that I had to pursue Him even in the hardest, busiest times of my life. When things are going smoothly, reading scripture is easy. Seeking God is no struggle. It’s when life takes over, when 24hrs isn’t enough to get things done, when everyday we’re in survival mode that we may stop making God priority without even knowing it. Making sure rent is paid is super important to all of us. Making sure there is food in the fridge for our children is vital. The enemy is keen to what matters to us the most and may choose to attack those areas to distract us. Yes, we pray and ask God for help but that 1 hour a day we used to seek His face sometimes turns to 10 minutes. Its human to respond to our feelings, to respond to an empty refrigerator, to a negative bank account, to loneliness, but it is spiritual to respond with urgency to the Holy Ghost.

 
Once we begin to push and bring ourselves out of the funk, we begin to see miracles. The struggle may not be over, but the anxiety disappears. We start to see the little love gestures God puts in front of us to show that He is in control… that He cares. There are many verses with stories of people who lost hope and God came through. Read them, and declare the restoration of your hope. Fight through the feelings, don’t give in! God has the last word.

 

Read about Sarah! Pregnant at old age???

Read about the woman with the issue of blood whos hope was restored

Moses also “felt” a certain way about himself

Eyes on the prize sister

Eyes on the prize sister,

What’s the reason why?

You look left and there she is

your enemy passing by.

She’s smiling and showing

all her great plans.

Eyes on the prize sister.

It’s a trap, grab my hand.

I’ll help you through it.

Wont beat you to it.

I’ll be by your side.

Helping you to the prize.

Eyes on the prize sister.

What glitters isn’t gold.

Listen to me my friend,

I’ll push you to the goal.

My prayers,

my compassion.

I love you within

Eyes on the prize sister.

When you win, I win.

 

 

Self-righteousness

We have this subtle and very sinful tendency

to look at what happens to someone else

and we think

we are not as bad of a sinner as they are

when the reality is,

we are all sinners at the core.

I urge you;

do not let the circumstances of others

make you think of yourself as righteous

for that self-righteousness in itself

is dreadfully sinful.

There is a difference between said faith and real faith

Said faith is just a transaction; you say your prayer of repentance and are assumed to be saved. It’s a sense of spirituality unconcerned with fellowship but concerned with individuality. There is no freedom, no passion, and sometimes said believers walk away from Christ as a whole because there hasn’t been a complete renewal of the mind.

I always thought I was saved when I first made that vocal transaction during the altar call. Afterwards, I didn’t sense a change in my heart. I was concerned with ensuring I was following the rules and regulations of the church to present myself as “holy” unto man. I didn’t understand what it meant to be Holy and no one explained to me that being Holy wasn’t possible by my own works. The day I decided to submit my life, my will and, my soul to the Lord, was the day I realized that the process of repentance wasn’t a same day procedure.

Repentance was like a dagger in my heart turning and turning with no mercy. The sadness was so crippling that every breath was so painful to take. God opened my eyes to my sin, made me aware of the people I have hurt and had me question my salvation as a whole. I knew where my soul was heading and I begged God to have mercy on me. Since I didn’t know about Grace at the time, I just assumed that my fate in Hell couldn’t be reversed. I begged God to make a way for me. I said “Lord, I know you’re all powerful and you could do anything you please. Could I ask that you make it so that I didn’t have to go to Hell? Could you bend the rules just this one time so that I could have a chance?”. After that day, the Lord began to show me Jesus. Not just the one I routinely sang about in church but the one that died and rose again…for me.

I heard of an older woman who attended church for the majority of her life saying that she wasn’t sure if she was going to Heaven or Hell. Jesus didn’t die on The Cross for us to question if His sacrifice worked or not. If you say that salvation is something you could lose then you may not have it at all to begin with. Teaching that you lose your salvation in just one sinful thought is saying that in one sinful thought, The Cross wasn’t enough. Yesterday, I was upset at how someone lied in my face and in that moment, the Holy Spirit reminded me how I lied to my mom a few months ago. Was my lie strong enough to revoke what The Cross did for me? If that is so, my destination will be forever Hell starting right now. I do my best to live a life pleasing to God but man I mess up A LOT. If it was that easy to lose my salvation…I. Will. Never. Make. IT.

Be careful how you preach salvation. I will never endorse living a sinful life as real Salvation encourages one to live free from sin. If you can stand confidently and say that you’re going to heaven because YOU live holy and YOU are sanctified and because YOU pray, fast, meditate, preach and recycle….id be concerned. You are Holy because of the Blood. You are Holy because Jesus covered your sin so that it doesn’t shine scarlet red before a Holy God.

Life is short

Make peace with your enemies.

Make peace with yourself.

Tell people you love them

And show them.

Take joy in what you have.

Quit seeking for more

Stop and smell the flower.

Take note of the small gestures.

Be compassionate and

Stop trying to know it all.

Life is short and so is this blog.

Don't waste anymore time, just spread the Love. God, Jesus, Holy Spirit. Share them!

Let Your Will Be Done

 

If you haven’t realized God’s character yet, you wouldn’t receive this blog the way it is intended to be received.

 

Only the courageous could pray “Let your will be done”. God’s will for us is not to be comfortable, it is not easy and its process produces tears like never before. “Let Your will be done” you say? Let’s examine those words…

 

Let:

 

Are you prepared to “let” and not fight it? Imagine caring for a toddler who loves to play in mud. Now, you spend a lot of your energy keeping him from going near mud. You sit him down but he gets up again, you put one of those child leashes on him and he screams, you take him elsewhere but you see him yearning for that mud. Then, a stranger passes by and says, “Just let him play in the mud”. Finally, you let him go and for some odd reason, there is peace. You sit down, relax, read a book peacefully knowing he is in the mud enjoying himself. Yes, in the back of your mind you know you must clean him up but that struggle doesn’t amount to the struggle of keeping him away from the mud. Letting God do His will in your life means that you are aware of the mess that will follow and can maintain your peace in the process. You obey His word and refrain from using alternatives to make the process easier. A great prize comes with a great fight and God’s will is never insignificant.

 

Your Will:

 

God is clear when He speaks about His will for all the believers.

 

Mark 16:15 And he said to them, “Go into all the world and proclaim the gospel to the whole creation.

 

If our deepest desires do not connect with Mark 16:15, I don’t think our plans would be aligned with God’s will for us. Yes, we have desires like getting married, having children, buying a home etc. but if those desires do not connect with God’s ultimate plan, we might realize that after obtaining what we want, we develop a desire for something else. The wants of the world never end. There is always something new we must get our hands on. When we trust God with our lives, our fleshy desires diminish. We find ourselves being please with what we have and prepared to share our abundance with those who do not. Once we submit to God’s will, God will then give us what we most desired. Scripture says,

 

Matthew 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well

Be Done:

 

I know a woman who was ministered to about what God had planned for her life. She was supposed to leave her job and open her own business along with taking care of some ministerial duties. She was so down and distraught about how her finances at home and probably within a month, she went back on the job market to start working again. She heard the call, she obeyed but couldn’t go through with it. She lost faith in God because of what was going on around her. If we are aware of God’s character, we know that God uses the most impossible situation to manifest Himself. If at any time, we used our own strength to bring ourselves out of a mess, God could not get all the credit. He will step back from our problem and let you work it out yourself. I mean, He is a gentleman.

 

“Let Your will be done” isn’t a simple prayer. It requires one to deny himself completely for the prayer to come to life. This prayer isn’t for the faint at heart.

 

What a Love We Found!

If our strength comes from the joy of the Lord (Nehemiah 8:10), what do we think of that sparks that joy. Is it the things that He has done for us? Miracles, breakthroughs or victories? How about His love? There is a song by Phil Wickham called “Your Love Awakens Me” and I have it on my “Worship” playlist on my phone for many reasons. I can’t unlock the best of what God has for me unless I am fully aware of how much He loves me.

The world has made it difficult. Some of us were raised without fathers. The person responsible for being a leader, a provider, to be our security and our standard of love…nowhere to be found. How could we understand the magnitude of God’s love if we don’t know how it feels to be loved? Some of us placed our hearts in the hands of a spouse and they tore it into pieces leaving nothing but empty promises, betrayal and abandonment. How could we ever trust a Being that isn’t visible or a God that isn’t perceptible? They say to trust in the Lord but trusting the closest people in our lives has proven to guide us towards sorrow and failure.

God is way ahead of us and already knows our deepest troubles hindering us from receiving the fullness of His love. Like scripture says, all we need to do is touch the boarder of His garment for a breakthrough. Push through the crowds, reach out and His power will begin to flow. Sometimes, we must give love another chance. This time, from God. Read scriptures daily and watch how the words come alive for you in your time of need.

When His love awakens us, we begin to see who we are in Him. We are set apart, special, the apple of His eye. He cares for our sorrows, He cares for our pain. He puts peace into our hearts when things seem to be at its worst. I’ve witnessed His love to be more powerful than any other thing that claims to offer love in any other form. Because of His love, He has taught me to love my family like He loves me. Not just an ordinary love but a love that requires sacrifice. I sacrifice myself, my desires, my comforts and my will for them and I will do it over and over until I die. That is what His Love has done for me. It awakened my spirit to be a better person. To lift myself from despair or to break out of my shortcomings. He teaches me and molds me into His image every time I get a taste of the Love He has for me. I can’t measure His love; therefore, I can’t imagine how great it is. When He simply shows me a hint of His heart, I can’t contain myself. His love for me opened my eyes to the sorrow of this world. Suddenly, I want to dedicate my life to the ministry and give it all I have. I mean, He gave me His Only Son.  

We can’t receive His love unless we tunnel our eyes towards Him. Forget what others has done to you and give it one more shot, that’s if you are at your last. You won’t regret it. I don’t speak in the voice of religion but in the heart of… – I understand because that was once me –

I Didn’t Know Where To Look

Story submitted by Joselyn W.

Four years ago I was going through a really hard time in my life. I made a decision without thinking it through but thought it was for the best.

That decision landed me behind bars for almost a year.

I was lost, confused and just didn’t know where to look. I was not going to church like I used to and I felt like God just gave up on me. The day of my sentencing I was able to go home and I had 3 months to surrender. I remember getting in my car and just yelling, crying wondering why! I knew that I did this to myself and didn’t think about anybody. I didn’t want to live anymore. I wanted to just go to a bridge and just jump. Nobody knew or understood the demon that I was fighting within.

One night I started to drive with no destination in mind and the devil was really attacking my spirit. I started to drive to the nearest bridge, thinking it would be the best thing to do. As I get closer to the bridge my phone rings it was my best friend. She just wanted to talk and I held every tear that I needed to so I wouldn’t give it away. She knew that I was going thru an emotional rollercoaster but she never knew how bad the thoughts that were going thru my mind were. As she was talking to me she started to tell me that everybody makes mistakes and we all learn from them. She said more words but she never knew or understood how she saved my life that day. It was God!

As my sentencing got closer, I remember hugging my son and just crying letting him know that mommy will be gone for a little while but that I will be back and he will be able to see me soon. We cried, hugged and said our I love you!

The day that I surrendered, I remember asking God to protect me. As I walked in and sat down I was surrounded by 4 walls. As I did my time God spoke to my heart and all I felt was peace. He let me see that some decisions in my life were not perfect but he was going to help me get thru them. He allowed me to see that the relationship that I was in at the time was not for me, and I let it go once I got home.

We all make mistakes. Some may be larger than others, but no matter what God will always be by our side. There are times when we feel like He stopped listening to us or that He doesn’t care, but He does. He will never leave our side no matter the disappointments that we provide to Him, He will always be there. He may allow us to fall at times but He will be by our side to pick us up. Lord knows that without the strength that He provided to me I may not be here today. He allows you to see the toxic people in your life and is up to you to let them go and learn from them!

 

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